Raising My Boys; a Personal Manifesto

After reading Tina Fey's prayer for her daughter, (which you can read here: http://www.parents.com/blogs/goodyblog/2011/05/tina-feys-a-mothers-prayer-for-her-daughter/ ) I felt moved to write down my own thoughts, hopes and intentions in raising my boys. I'm calling it my manifesto because, well, because it sounds wicked cool. Here's the definition of the word "manifesto":

MANIFESTO: a written statement declaring publicly the intentions, motives, or views of its issuer


By it's very definition a manifesto must be made public, so here ya go, blogosphere. It's my hope that, by publishing it to my own wee little blog, I will feel more accountable to these goals. It's my hope that I'll remember this post when one of my kids is being a fartface, here's hoping that it inspires more patience and commitment from me during the tough spots.

Kids, here are my intentions in raising you from babbling infants to bright, compassionate young men.

I will love you. More importantly, I will make sure that you know how loved you are.

I will enjoy you. I will try to remember that this time is short and you'll be stressed and rushed, like the rest of us, soon enough. Let's play.

I will fess up when I've made a mistake. You'll make them too and you should see how fessing up is done. You should know that your Dad and I aren't perfect, we're all a work in progress.

I will try to say 'yes' more than I say 'no' but I will say 'no'. And I will mean it.

I will try to develop an interest in train sets, transformers and muscle cars. Still, I'll hope that you might have a tea party with me occasionally.

I will hear you out when you're looking like the guilty party. I won't, arbitrarily, put the word of an adult above yours.

I will demand that you bring your friends over for us to meet, I'll try not to embarrass you.

I will want to know where you're going and when you'll be home.

I will pick you up, wherever you are, no matter what time it is. Do not drink and drive, do not let some stoner drive you home.

I will keep my calm when you're facing what looks like an insurmountable problem. We'll come up with something together. When you're out of earshot, I'll lose my mind with worry.

I will teach you to respect people. I want you to know that men can marry women, men can marry men, women can marry women and that's the way it should be. Family is about love, not gender.

I will encourage you to stick up for others and yourself.

I will make you do your homework and clean your room.

I will hand you cleaning supplies when you make a mess.

I will be your parent, not your buddy.

I will always appreciate and encourage the special relationship you have with your Dad. You guys couldn't have asked for a better role model.

I will make your favourite meal on your birthday. Every year. Even if it's hot dogs.

I will tell you that Disney's idea of a prince is garbage. Most girls don't need to be rescued, they're pretty capable of taking care of themselves. A real prince washes dishes.

I will teach you the difference between needs and wants. We'll shell out for your needs, you'll need to save up for your wants.

I will bite my tongue when I don't like the person you're dating. You'll figure it out on your own.

I will ask you to give your seat up for a pregnant woman or an elderly person.

I will teach you to say "That's unacceptable. May I speak to your manager?", when dealing with phone companies and other headache inducing salespeople.

I will show you how we manage our money. You will get an allowance, not for doing chores, but because learning about money is a life skill and it's our job to teach you. You'll do chores because we're a family, not because we're paying you.

I will be supportive when you bring home a bad grade. I will also ask you what you think went wrong and how you will fix it.

I will remind you that it's OK to ask for help. It's OK to need help sometimes.

I will encourage you to follow your interests. In play, in school and, finally, in your career. You've got to love what you do or you'll go crazy.

I will do my damnedest to talk you out of face tattoos and earlobe stretching. Because this guy doesn't look as cool as he thinks he does.

I will encourage you to travel while you're young. Work, marriage, car payments and a mortgage can wait. You should see Thailand and then tell me all about it. While you're away, I'll lose my mind with worry.

I will be on your team now and for as long as I'm alive. In fact, I bet that I'll be on your team even when I'm no longer living. I've got your back, kiddos.

*I'm linking up this older post with a fantastic blogging community at YeahWrite. Please check out the other bloggers linked up there and come back to vote for your favourites on Thursday*

http://yeahwrite.me/57-open-challenge/